As with most men, I have explored my dominant sexual power in one way or another. Ever since I was a teenager I have been fascinated with sex and the nuances that are associated with it. In my middle teenage years I was lucky enough to have a partner who was slightly older than myself whom was willing to teach me more about sex – she wasn’t shy about exploring various kinks that I proposed, even if I was shy about doing so. It was her willingness to be such an open minded partner which has allowed me to this day to be the man that I am, I believe.
I’m not ashamed to say that sex, in those years, built up the confidence that I utilize even now in my day to day dealings. She helped me build myself up, to be confident in who I am and what sort of individual that I could be. She taught me to not be ashamed of my sexuality, of my gender – even if I didn’t identify entirely as a ‘man’, in the traditional sort of way. I didn’t and I don’t. Raised by a woman, much of my early life was shaped from my mother’s point of view.
I firmly believe that she is the reason as to why I am more emotionally aware than many of my male friends. As I’ve grown older, sex has remained an important part of my life but it is no longer merely the physical pursuit of release and pleasure. Instead, I seek to emotionally fulfill myself with a connection to that partner. I am able to approach sex without shyness or shame, I can be proud of who I am despite the vilifying of men that has taken hold of our society while balancing my emotional demands with my physical pursuits.